Mm. Yes.

Today I did a lot of thinking. And research. I made quite a few discoveries. I rediscovered a scar on the back left of my head, why it’s there is a long story that takes us back to the nursery school of my youth, Eastwood and a boy called Ryan with a stupidly long nose. He was a bastard gotterdammnte him. Anyway.


I re-read a couple of books and learnt how to commit the perfect murder. Good to know these things right?

I also decided that in the unlikely event of yours truly moving to America, I would move here;

(Portland, OR) Because the pictures are pretty and it’s green, lots of lovely trees :) and it frequents my dreams like a bar. It seems a nice enough place, not too shabby, not too clean. Finally, I really like the name. It sounds like Oregano, the herb, which makes me smile because its my favourite herb. Whenever I dream about moving here there’s always a little boy somewhere in the picture. He always runs up to me and leaps into my arms, I wonder who he is.

I had two dreams in as many naps (disturbed night) both of which I was in the army. Can somebody please explain to me why the armed forces are such a large part of my dreams of late? Everybody knows that discipline + work + me is an unbalanced equation! It isn’t quite right! Little boy pops in again in each of these.

Nightmares of late are the same too; a friend is in a coma or dying of some form of cancer.

Just come up with a quick analytical recipe for these three ingredients;

A big commitment that I respect and kill to honour and preserve. Travelling in the line of duty whatever that should be a big enough commitment for me to need to be stationed there permanently and the child, a ward? Aunty Sarah is what he always calls me. So that could either mean that I become a blood relative to a boy who can no longer be cared for by his mother (why America confuses the hell outta me at this point because Anna’s a home bird) or he’s the child of a dear friend –I’m a God-mother?- The friend dying. Is this showing to me how deeply afraid I am of the word you use for that final farewell? I’m not too sure.



I’ll add more later. I need to do some work, IA and Geog.

Aliens abduct me now!



The Olympic Torch xx